Love and care never disappears.

And there's that heart by his name that never truly fades away...

I keep having to remind myself he cares, because I forget.

These pockets; they hold secrets, you see. Because nobody knows the story.

All I really want is trust.

Narnia.

Surrounded by nothing but darkness
And silence.
Blinded as to where I'm going.
Narnia, I call it.
Covered in ice
This lovely Winter night.
I sit here and swing,
Alone in the dark.
I cannot feel the cold at all,
But I can hear it
Rushing past my ears
And brushing through my hair
As I go higher and higher.
I want to fly high enough
To leave.
I'll become part
Of the night sky...
Another bright star
For gazers to stare at
In awe.

Whispers all around.
No one is there;
I'm alone.
Stalked by the sound of
Venomous voices.
Although I cannot interpret
The words they speak of me,
Their whispers still string
Straight to my soul.
My legs won't carry me away fast enough
To escape the whispered words
Being whipped at me with full force.
With each slice,
My body and mind
Breaks down a little bit more.
Diminished and crumpled
Uncomfortable on the ground,
I must let failure have me.

As long as you hold on tight,
You won't be carried away by the
Rough winds...
Until you harshly
Are ripped away.
Nothing to grip onto.
You have no choice
But to let the tornado
Destroy you to pieces.

Cold air slices it's way
Through your body
At the speed of light,
And sharper than
The sharpest sword there is.
Frozen and stunned.
Feel the numb
Steal your body from you.
Only your mind and soul remains.
Frosty and icy,
Waiting.
Love can warm your heart
And help find your body
If not left for too long.

Have you ever noticed that when people meet, they tend to skip over learning the basics and try to dive straight into the deeper stuff instead?

For Christmas I wanted to give you my heart. But I couldn't because you slammed the door in my face and left my heart and I out there to freeze.

I consider myself to be emotionally strong. But I need to suck it up and quit being such a damn weak pussy when it comes to physical pain. I shy away from anything that could cause me physical damage, whether it be a hamster or moving while I'm sore... It's pathetic, really. I have to breathe in physical pain and stand up to it. Cutting makes me less weak. I suffer through the pain until it no longer hurts and I am not afraid. And I can release my anger that way as well.

Venomous.

I must learn to stop spitting out my words like venom at everybody. I have to instead be polite and patient. I throw my words like daggers sometimes, the same way I send daggers towards people through glares. I must also learn that violence is not the right way to get what I want, even though it may work well. Although subtle and no-so-physically damaging, what I do leaves scars and a bad reputation for myself.

Honestly.

I feel strength in telling the truth. It feels better than the devious feeling I get from telling lies. But lies tend to get me farther than the truth does. When I speak the truth, I become more and more alone. When I let people know me, they leave. Nobody believes me when I tell the truth, they only believe my lies.

I made a few wrong turns. I’ve led myself to the rough road to failure. I could turn around now and find my way back to the road to success… But I’m speeding down here so fast, that if I dare to try to slow down, I’m going to end up crashing. But if I continue going down it at this speed, I’m going to crash anyway. A high speed crash, which I’m heading towards, will likely end in an instant death for me… There would be no pain of having to walk back down this lonely road wounded and ruined, searching weakly for the right road; the road where I could get help and make my way to happy success. I could finally sleep and dream on forever and ever with nobody shattering it all…

Blossoming Cherry Trees.

A path that seems to go on,
And on,
And on...
Lined with blooming cherry trees.
Petals lightly floating through the sky;
Never do I see them hit the ground,
Yet there they lay.
Sun beams
Push their light through
Spreaded tree branches,
Breaking through
Into my fantasy
And touching me.
Warmth tickles my soft skin,
Bringing with it comfort
And light weight;
Light enough
To lift my feet off the ground,
Spread my wings,
And rise above
The height of the trees.
Golden clouds,
Pink skies...
A halo encircles my head.
I cover myself in white,
Flowy dresses that hug my body perfectly.
I'm free.

Never before
Had I felt the aching
Of a heartache
For somebody.
I don't know the pain of
A heart break.
And a heart breaks,
And a heart breaks,
And a heart br-aches
For you.
I... miss you.

Fire Burning, Fire Burning.

Red, dancing flames
Circle me
And warm me,
But never burn me.
But never burn me.
The comfort
Of darkness
That light could never bring.

I think, I think, I think, I think.
Thinking.
Thoughts.
That's all there is.
Who knows?
Nobody knows...
I think.

Poison touches
Burn the skin.